The Responsibilities Of A Husband ( The Chief Security Officer) in the home and marriage is one that must not be taken lightly.
In the Bible, the role of the husband starts with leadership as seen in Ephesians 5:23 which says;
“ For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior”.
The husband is the Chief Executive Officer (CEO) of the Wife. As the head of his wife, he is responsible for the safety of his Wife and their home. This also makes him the Chief Security Officer (CSO)
Who is a Chief Security Officer?
The Chief Security Officer (CSO)is the executive in a company or an organization, responsible for the organization’s entire security plan, both physical and cyber.
The husband from the definition of who the Chief Security Officer is, as the head of the wife and their home, is responsible for the physical and spiritual security of his family.
As Christ is the protector of his bride the Church, so husbands are to be the protectors of their wives; but that’s not the case in many marriages and home today.
Husbands who are supposed to be the Chief Security Officers of their wives are the ones putting them in harm’s way because they want to save their life and head not minding its implication for their wives.
One thing that surprises me is that the same husband who will not lift a finger to protect his wife and seems to have forgotten that after paying the bride price and fulfilling the marital rites, is now one body with him, and his failure to protect her, is him falling to protect himself, will move the Earth and mountain to protect a blood relative of his or an extended family member.
But his wife who should be his No 1 priority to protect, he puts in harm’s way.
The case study I will like us to look at is that of Abraham and Sarah as seen in our text in Genesis 10: 12-20 (Pharaoh in Egypt), and Genesis 20:1-17( Abimelek King of Gerar).
In our case study, Abraham the husband of Sarah, found it so easy to lie and say that she was his sister, convinced her to lie too and gave out his wife Sarah to two totally strange men whose desire was to sleep with her because he wanted to protect his own life and head.
When Abimelek King of Gerar) found out what he did, he said;
“ You have done things to me that should never be done. And Abimelek asked Abraham, what was your reason for doing this ?”
Abraham replied,
‘ I said to myself, surely no fear of God in this place, and they will kill me because of my wife.’
It was so easy for him to give out Sarah without putting up a fight on her behalf, let it now be said that he was overpowered. But the same Abraham who could not protect his wife did not blink an eye to gather his men together and go to battle when he got the news that his nephew Lot was kidnapped.
“ They also carried off Abram’s nephew Lot and his possessions, since he was living in Sodom. A man who escaped came and reported this to Abram the Hebrew. When Abram heard that his relative had been taken captive, he called out the 318 trained men born in his household and went in pursuit as far as Dan. He recovered all the goods and brought back his relative Lot and his possessions together with the women and the other people”. Genesis 14:1-16.
The LORD God himself, had to personally fight to protect Sarah by inflicting serious diseases on these men and their household, which made it impossible for them to defile Sarah.
Abram who was supposed to be her protector even at the expense of his life failed in his responsibility as her husband.
Like father, like son, it is said.
Isaac the son of Abraham did not hesitate to follow in his father’s footsteps when he found himself in the same situation as his father.
He lied when the men of Gerar asked him about his wife, he said,
“She is my sister,” because he was afraid to say, “She is my wife.” He thought, “ The men of this place might kill me on account of Rebekah because she is beautiful.” Because he wanted to protect his life.
If Abimelek King of the Philistines in Gerar had not caught him and Rebekah playing an unusual play for a brother and sister when he looked down from a window, Rebekah just like her mother-in-law Sarah would have been given out to strange men to sleep with, by her husband so that he can save his life.
Dear husbands, it is enough to love your wife, you also have to protect her.
“What you love you protect.”
Isaac loved his wife Rebekah enough to stand before God and plead with Him to give her a child, but not enough to give his life for her own if need be.
So he lied that she was his sister to protect his life.
“God so loved the world that He gave his only begotten son” John 3:16
When you love someone, you give everything to see them taken care of and in safety. God led by example.
In Genesis 2: 24 it’s written; that a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.
After performing the marital rites, your wife, not immediate or extended family is your NO 1 responsibility.
You leave them and cleave (glued ) to your wife.
You are to protect your wife from every form of danger, both spiritually, internally, and externally, as her Chief Security Officer.
The Responsibilities Of A Husband ( The Chief Security Officer) are :
Spiritually:
A husband should be a spiritually strong man to protect his family, from the devil, spiritual forces, and demons who wage war against his wife and home.
He should stand in the gap as the priest in the home, to make declarations and prayers lifting his wife and children to God in prayer always.
It’s the responsibility of the husband; when things are difficult and your family is suffering, to hold them up in prayer and point them to Jesus Christ as the answer to their needs.
It’s the responsibility of the husband to feed his family with the spiritual food they need to be nourished and grow in the things of God, by gathering his wife and children regularly around the word of God.
Physical strength, six packs, and going to the gym to build muscles and keep fit are good as they will enable you to move things physically around the house when there is a need for that.
A godly woman will appreciate spiritual strength more than she would physical strength.
As a husband, you need to be strongly rooted in spiritual warfare and affairs so that when your wife looks up to you for direction, you will not be found wanting.
Internally :
Husbands, it’s your responsibility to protect your wife from internal family members like; your father, mother, sisters, brothers, nephew, niece, grandmother, grandfather, uncles, and kinsmen who disrespect, abuse, or look down on her.
- You must set boundaries that they are not to cross when it comes to your wife.
- You must also watch how you treat and talk to your wife before them.
You cannot treat your wife as trash before your internal family members, and expect them to treat her as a queen.
Externally :
Husbands, it’s your responsibility to protect your wife externally from outsiders, and friends who disrespect her or speak to her inappropriately be it In family gatherings, parties, church, office, or anywhere at all.
Your wife must be protected.
When she’s wrong, it’s your responsibility to defend your wife in public; correct her in private.
Do not embarrass or scold her publicly.
Husbands you are to do this with every sense of responsibility because you know that; you and your wife are one, and any insult or disrespect given to your wife, is as good as you are the one that is insulted and disrespected.
Thus if anyone can not disrespect you as an individual, he or she should not disrespect your wife because although both of you have two different human bodies, by virtue of your covenant marital vows before the LORD God, both of you have become one body and spirit.
Young Men Dating and Courting :
If you are a young man dating or courting to marry, and you know that deep down in your heart, the lady you are dating or courting now, you are not ready to protect and willing to die for, you have no business marrying her.
Stop and find someone who you are willing and ready to love and protect with your life, if push comes to shove because it’s your responsibility required of you, as the Chief Security Officer of your home.
God has given men greater physical strength than women and has also given men a need or desire to be protectors.
You are to use this God-given strength to protect your wife and ensure that she feels secure.
She must know that you will protect her even at the cost of your own life.
You are to love your wife as Christ loved the Church in Ephesians 5:25.
Christ loved the church to the extent of laying down his life for the Church, His bride.
As a godly husband, you are to imitate Christ in this.
God Bless You.
You will enjoy reading ;
Kingdom Keys To Marrying Right Part 1
